It’s come to my attention that you or someone you know is with child. I know this because you or your friend has emailed, texted, twittered, or facebooked me and asked me a form of the following question: What should I get? If you do not fall under this category, you may skip this chapter and go back to your lunchtime margarita. Everyone else, thanks for asking. For some reason you think I know things which helps me believe I know things. This week alone I’ve gotten over a dozen inquiries, which seems like a strange coincidence–but I’ll roll with it. I like making lists.
For a while I had been deferring to this post, a top ten list I made one month after Waylon was born of all my favorite new mom and new baby products. It’s a good list, although I’d definitely replace the Moby Wrap with an Ergo Carrier (save your back and thank me later). This list contains similar items with a few new additions from the perspective of a more seasoned parent. You learn a lot in the first year. Like don’t buy a wipes warmer. You do not need a wipes warmer.
As an aside, often when bloggers make gift guides they make them very beautiful and link to 65 dollar wooden rattles. I think this is wonderful (I like beautiful things), but realistically your new mom friend does not need a 65 dollar wooden rattle. In fact, babies don’t need much of anything, which is why most of these gifts go to mama.
Enjoy.
|1|
Post birth outfit
One of my most treasured baby gifts was a nursing gown and robe to wear after Waylon was born. Not only was it comfortable and roomy, it helped me feel better about myself while I was feeling like a washed up jellyfish in front of visitors.
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Burp Cloths
See it on Amazon
You can never have too many burp cloths, especially in the first few months when they all disappear into the laundry basket and you wonder when you’ll ever smell normal again (you will). Pretty ones are best. It’s the small things.
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Postpartum Massage
See it on Amazon
There is no better way to say, “Congratulations for pushing a 9 pound child out of your vagina” than a massage gift card! I’m absolutely certain of this.
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White Onesies
See it on Amazon
Like burp clothes, one can never have enough white onesies. This is especially true for mamas with baby boys who are tired of clothing covered in trucks and puppies (me).
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Diapers
I know it seems boring because fact: it is boring. But having diapers delivered is a Godsend. Order a whole box off Amazon (cheaper) and you will be a hero.
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Netflix Or HuluPlus Giftcard
Feeding a baby takes time. Boost morale with some feeding entertainment, like the ability to watch favorite shows on Hulu or Netflix. Or, drop off a few of your favorite chick flicks. The act (and the movies) will make her cry.
|7|
Nursing tank tops
I’ve worn a nursing tank top almost every day for a year and a half. Lucky Austin! They are so comfortable and convenient that I’ve become a walking commercial. Target has a great selection for around 20 dollars a top. Worth it.
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Service
One of the best gifts for a new mom is acts of service; gentle, no nonsense, quiet service. But there are rules. For example, don’t give a printed out coupon that says ”This coupon equals one dish washing experience!” or make statements such as, “Let me know when you’d like a load of laundry done!” Instead just do the dishes. Do the laundry. Make sure it’s a good time, yes. But don’t make a new mom ask for help, just help. Also don’t bring your kids along “to help.” Just help. Just you. Be quiet. Bring snacks.
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Food
Dropping off a meal for a new family is a nice thing to do. Dropping off a bag of groceries is even nicer. Suggested drop off items: Bread, cheese, cookies, nuts, homemade trailmix, white cheese popcorn, chips, salsa, fresh produce, cranberry juice, pads, soap, toothbrushes. This is, hands down, one of the best new mom gifts.
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Ergo Baby Carrier
See it on Amazon
You want to give the baby a gift? I understand. This is the best baby carrier. The baby will love it. Mom will love it. Don’t bother with anything else. The Moby is great, but it’s complicated and not worth the money.
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Please note that no one is paying me to write this post. Although if you ever click on a link from my site to Amazon and buy the product — I will receive roughly three pennies. Thank you in advance! It should also be noted that the image above is not my own. I never looked that good pregnant.
Love the idea of a bag of groceries. A friend did this for me along with a frozen casserole & it was awesome – you can never have too many healthy snacks, esp. when breastfeeding! And although I love my Moby for the newborn phase, I get alot more miles out of our Ergo! Fun list!
The moby is fun. I even nursed Waylon a few times in that thing. But the Ergo is just more practical (and comfortable).
This is the best list. Yes yes yes to it all. I actually ordered a birthing gown that looks really similar to the ones in that etsy shop from a different etsy shop. Hopefully it will wash nicely so I can wear it more than when she in born. Either way I wanted to feel pretty this time instead of beached and pale and hospitally.
I love the grocery idea too. My SIL brought us a basket of fruit. Every new Mama should get like three baskets of fruit topped with a bottle of colace. Amen?
Also – I am not doing a meal train thing this time where people come and “drop off” meals. Because “drop off” to some people means stay for 2 hours and breathe their strep throat breath on my 3 day old baby. It is so important to literally just drop off the meal. Don’t ask to hold their baby unless they offer and if you are one of those friends that is close enough for them to invite to stay longer then yes, please do the dishes. And thank you for mentioning not to bring your kids. Because they will REALLY breathe their germ breathe on your babe and then sneeze on their face (this happened to us).
Great list!!
Amen.
I just want to shout a big “AMEN!” to this list. It is spot on. These are the things a new mom wants and needs. You have forgotten nothing. Netflix. Yep. To cry over all of those reruns of Parenthood while you breastfeed for 18 hours of the day. Totally. Diapers. Oh, yes please. Because you never want to have to worry about going out to the grocery store and figure out how to hold a baby and push a shopping cart and lean over to pick up that big box on the bottom shelf and risk tear your girl-part stitches. TERRIFYING!
Really, the greatest greatest gift I have ever received (and I still get a little teary-eyed when I think about it) came when my in-laws brought over an entire load of groceries when my daughter was born. They’d thought of everything. The essentials, like eggs and milk and bread, but also nice treats like special tea and cookies and (of course) diapers and wipes. People, if you can afford to do this for your loved ones when they have a baby, I promise they will never forget it!!
What a GIFT.
You can never go wrong with food!
She shoots, she scores! You’ve done it again. Best. List. Ever.
Thanks Sara!
Oh my goodness #8 yes. People were coming over to visit all the time, but no one ever helped with dishes or cleaning or anything. Now I can’t wait until someone I know has a baby so I be a better friend than I probably have been in the past! Since I’m 37 weeks pregnant myself, I might just have to casually post this on facebook or something :)
I am full of shame when I think of my pre-parent self visiting friends with babies. I knew nothing. I would just come and hold the baby and eat their chips and salsa. NO.
My friend brought brownies. I mean, casseroles are nice…but always bring brownies.
Also, when my mom left, I found notes around the house for weeks – beside the rocking chair, in my closet, in the cabinet where I kept the oversized pads. All of them telling me that YES I can be a mom and YES I’m still pretty and YES I can cry any time I feel like it. Best gift ever.
LOVE THIS.
Nothing like loving affirmations from your mom when you’re in the thick of new motherhood.
Love.
This is the best top 10 list you have ever made.
Yes yes yes yes.
WOW this list is great!… I might have to drop a few hints to family and friends on facebook!
YES. As a new mom to a 3 month old, I co-sign this list.
It’s funny though, since we’re so far from friends and family, we’ve only had a few people visit us. And in the early days, that was awesome. Recovering from a C-section is shitty and I did NOT want to see anyone. So maybe…don’t visit? As a gift? I guess just read the situation. If new mom doesn’t want visitors, don’t ask to visit. Let her tell you when she’s ready.
This list is perfection… the church we attending when W was born offered the meal thing (2 weeks straight of meals) but we said no because of the whole kids coming and poking on our baby ordeal… I knew that most of them would treat it as an outing and load up their 6-8 kids (I’m not joking…. most have that many under the age of 6 or so) and come to stay for a few hours. I could not handle that! We were ver a y happy with our decision plus my husband actually likes to cook so it worked out well. A few weeks after the newness had worn off, a few friends did bring meals which we loved. I think I craved for things like groceries, snacks or let’s face it, plates of anything with sugar in it to dropped off… that makes a person feel loved!
I am saving this list for sure…
This is good stuff. I received a Land’s End robe with Gus and it’s really soft and makes me feel less large and in charge.
Also, I’ve had friends call and say, “Hey, we’re picking up (inserts restaurant here) for dinner and we’re bringing you guys some. What should we order?” score!
When there’s an older (neglected) child involved, offer to take said child to the park or out to lunch. That way mom can sit on the couch and just nurse and watch tv.
That’s a great idea. Yes.
I really agree with this one. I just gave birth yesterday and today my in-laws took the two older ones and went to the PA farm show for a couple hours. Peace and quiet reigned. A chance to sleep. It was wonderful.
I forgot to mention it was a home birth. That’s why the children are around.
I have three month old twins. These are our first babies and I had a c-section. I NEVER anticipated as many visitors as we had and how difficult that made things. I felt like I needed to be dressed when I wanted to be in my pj’s and people lingered around for way too long when I needed to pump, nap, etc. If we ever have more children, I think I will want the first couple of weeks just to ourselves to get adjusted.
The one thing that did help so much was when people dropped off meals. We didn’t have to think about going grocery shopping for 3 weeks or so and that was great.
This is a great list Kate!
Great Gifts.
I think this might be one of the best impromptu grocery lists I’ve ever read. It IS hard to know what to get to make the fridge feel full, you know? To it I would only add: chicken salad. Have a tub of that makes me feel like anything can be survived.
Best list ever.
Too passive aggressive to forward this to everyone in my address book? (39 weeks pregnant)