A few decades ago, men weren’t even allowed in the delivery room. Now it’s your man, your Douala, your doctor, and your birth photographer.
Every day, more and more woman are voluntarily putting their bodies and new babies in front of the camera to capture the first moments of life. It started with celebrities and trickled down to the hippies, home birthers, and Kelle Hamptons. Now it’s commonplace.
When I was pregnant with Waylon, I swore off any photos or offers to videotape the birth of my son. I was sensitive about being embarrassed and worried it might get a little National Geographic in there, with images better kept out of the family scrapbook.
In retrospect, I regret not having the moment I saw my son for the first time on camera. I can hope my brain will never forget it, but sometimes I wish for proof of my soul filled joy.
After researching it a bit, I found that this new niche of photography does have its own set of problems. Some hospitals ban photography while women are giving birth. Videotaping tends to set off even more alarms and is often strictly forbidden. There are places, however, where the doctors and nurses on duty unofficially set their own rules, some even allowing birth photographers to be present during C-sections. Obviously home births are the easiest gig. There, the mother calls the shots (Source).
Admittedly, I’m not sure I want a whole photoshoot of my lady parts in such a sad state of affairs, but apparently I don’t have to. In fact, most clients just want pictures after the baby has made their way out of the ring of fire, which makes sense. The whole thing is a bit messy.
I will say, however, that having done it once has changed my pre-baby National Geographic fears. Yes, birth is raw, but a pregnant woman drenched in sweat and bellowing has become beautiful to me. I kind of wish I could watch the whole thing over again. I’m already scheming about including my BFF (and amazing photographer) in the next ordeal. At the very least, I hope to set up a tripod.
Things could get weird.
What about you? Would you hire a birth photographer?
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I love birth photos. The more the better.
Agreed!
Agreed!
My brother who is a photographer was in the room with us. He was way up by my head almost in the bathroom haha as to not be too close or become traumatized. Looking back it was the best decision. My little guy was in the nicu for a week and I only got to hold him a handful of times so having those pictures of our first moments together were/are priceless. I moved to the other side of the country and am expecting again. Now I worry about who will take the pictures if he can’t be here.
That’s amazing!
I would love if my brother would agree to that!
yes! before A i thought “no, no nooo way”, now I wish SO much I had a few pictures of her first moments and of K and I meeting her for the first time. yes, they are in my memory, but i’m nervous they’ll get fuzzy. i hope to have a birth photographer the next time, even if it’s just being intentional about inviting someone i love and feel comfortable with being at the birth and handing them a camera.
That’s exactly how I feel. I wouldn’t hire anyone and I don’t want a stranger in the room. Just someone I love and care about who knows how to take a picture and can also rejoice in the new life.
I wish I’d had someone take a photo of our first moments with Taylor, especially since she ended up in the NICU. I had planned for my sister to come in and take pictures after we got settled in together, but obviously that didn’t work out. If there is ever a next time we’ll definitely have someone there to capture it.
Would you ever photograph a birth? You have an eye for photography even though you aren’t what you call a “professional.” I think that if we knew each other I might beg you :) Because I also did not have any pictures taken until after my daughter was born. I really regret it.
Yes! I would love to photograph a birth.
Nope. No. Uh uh. I like that those really special moments are just for me, in my memory. Besides, maybe I’m odd, but pictures just don’t do it for me. They don’t evoke the fuzzy feelings like I suppose they do for a lot of people.
I am in the same camp. My daughter’s birth was memorable and beautiful and amazing, and so were the moments leading up to it because my husband and I got some really private and special time together. Having someone else in the room, be it a stranger or a friend, would infringe on that. Plus, I don’t want the photographs of that moment to “become” my memories.
I think it looks great, when people post those beautiful edited pictures on their blog and it always makes me cry but I also don’t know how they look so good seconds after birth… I am jealous! My husband was really good about taking pictures right at the moment and I cherish them so much! I’d like to be brave and say for the this next one I would like a photographer but I know I wouldn’t really be comfortable with it, unless it was my sister, etc. And my husband isn’t too keen on family members being in on the birth so I think that is out… but by all means, do it for your next one… those moments are priceless!
The pictures of me after Waylon are so, so bad. I look like death.
I would not have a stranger in the room either.
Glad to know I am not the only one… I look at some of these pictures and just wonder… was someone doing their hair and make-up while they pushed that child into the world or what? :) Jealous? yes but also in awe… :)
HAHA! I just sent my BFF, who is a wonderfully talented photographer, the song I want to use in my birth photo slideshow…for the child I “plan” on having in about 18 months ;-)
I was totally weirded out in having ANYONE in the room with #1, but for #2, it’s not so scary.
Exactly.
Nope. I specifically didn’t want to be on camera after the lack of a working epidural :P If anyone’s going to take pictures, it’ll be my husband. He did take Tommy’s first picture at less than 10 minutes old, which was fine for me. We also have his first video when he was about 30 minutes old…although I wish I didn’t have to see my exhausted half-drugged and dazed self on camera, LOL.
Oh I know. Maybe next time I’ll try not to have so many chins.
I REALLY wish I had done it. I was super shy and only wanted my husband in there with me…but what I wouldn’t give now for some of those first moments pics.
No, I think it’s pretty over-the-top. Maybe it’s bc I’m not a great photographer (my camera fits in my back pocket), but sometimes all these perfect, bright photos of EVERY MOMENT EVER kind of weird me out. It seems like so much pressure for everything, including birth, to be lovely and picturesque.
I’m such a downer! Sorry. :)
Not a downer. I totally get it.
No, think of all the millions of births that have occurred since the beginning of time. I am sure glad we are not now wading through the residue of thoughts and pictures on the matter and the storage of said documentation and the narcissism… Yes, I do like the few polaroid pictures that a kind nurse in the NICU took of our first son, but when I contemplate those who have gone before and the lack of photography that accompanies their lives, I am most moved by their testimonies, only mildly curious to know what they looked like and slightly disappointed that there are many important skills that are lost which could possibly be understood again if there were more pictures of ‘the way things were’; but even while I acknowledge that the children love to pour over pictures of when they were young [and some of that is ok] overall, we should be training to look forward, not back…
Sorry! you probably were not looking for a sermon. You are welcome to delete this comment if you like. :)
I never delete comments! (Unless they are really mean).
Thanks for sharing your perspective. I have thought about a few of those same things myself.
I wholeheartedly agree. I was going to say something along these lines but deleted it because when I typed it it just sounded mean!
I try to be open minded when it comes to other’s beliefs and decisions, so I’m not offended when someone disagrees. I appreciate and really enjoy discussion!
I read this blog because of how open and honest you are. You aren’t critical of other people’s paths of life and you always try to talk about things objectively and fairly. Thank you for that!
It’s funny how easily we can be judgmental over something silly like another person having someone take pictures of their birth. If only we could lead by example, instead of with our tongues, and consider that our own perspective might not always be black or white.
PS: Like you, I’d also like to have a close friend or my sister there to take pictures when I have a baby.
I regret not having someone take pictures of Liam’s first few moments of life. Like you said, a close friend would have been perfect.
I don’t think it’s selfish or weird or dumb to have a birth photographer, but I would never have one. I’m too self conscious!
Photographing my births are not my thang, you know? I’m kinda modest and I also don’t want my husband to worry about a camera in a moment like that. With our first we just savored it as it was. With our second, a few weeks ago, he was born on the doormat of the ER in front of everyone waiting in the ER so who knows who secretly whipped out their iPhones and took a picture? (I had a ca-razy 45 minute labor…it was not my intention to have the baby on a doormat haha)
As someone who has always LOVED looking at pictures of the past, whether my own old yearbooks or pictures of my parents’ childhoods, I think that pictures taken during a birth are priceless. All the ones that I have seen have been tasteful and beautiful. We don’t have any actual pictures of the birth of our children, but I treasure the ones taken in the minutes and hours after they were born. (The memories of the births of my children are the clearest and most precious memories that I have.) Also, I disagree with the reader who implied that children shouldn’t be given much time to look at old photos. “Putting the past behind us” isn’t a value that I hold to. It is as we integrate the past, present, and future that we experience the richest life available to us.
Agreed.
i think i definitely would. the more birth stories i read the more i think it’d be amazing to have pictures of the first moment you met your kid…but, here’s my question…if it’s your first kid, then how do you know when to tell the photographer to show up at the hospital?? would they wait for hours on end? would they eventually go home, or fall asleep? what if you wait and call them too late and they miss it?! i clearly have a lot of questions. also, how do you convince your husband that it’s necessary to pay a stranger to take pics… :)
I like the idea of having someone you know and trust be there to take pictures. Someone who wouldn’t mind waiting 48 hours.