As I mentioned on Friday, I left Waylon overnight for the first time this weekend for a grand total of 36 hours. I was nervous way back in the summer when the plans were first made, but when the time finally came, the whole thing seemed rather undramatic. My only sliver of a worry was my baby’s mental health after 15 months of being attached to my body. I pictured him sullenly walking around the house, tears running down his face, searching for me like an abandoned puppy. A pitiful orphan. My poor Oliver Twist.
Of course that didn’t happen. Now that he sleeps through the night and eats man food, the whole thing was a piece of cake. He spent all day with my Mom and sister and the rest of the time with his #1 pal, Baby Daddy. I like to think he missed me a little bit, but the reports are inconclusive. Apparently he spent a lot of time smiling and eating goldfish.
I was fine too. I felt sick to my stomach for the first ten minutes and then I got over it and had a fabulous weekend away eating gourmet foods and being pampered with things like massages and designer shoes. A big thanks to Auntie Pat for being so generous. She throws this soiree for all the women in Austin’s family every year, and every year she outdoes the last. It’s pretty incredible, but I’ll stop bragging about it.
I will brag about the fact that I only had to pack one bag. ONE BAG and a simple purse; not a mom purse, not an overstuffed backpack full of pretzels and butt-wipes, not a diaper bag. A teeny, tiny, college girl purse. It was amazing.
I would show you pictures, but I intentionally abandoned my phone and camera to focus on conversation, lemon curd, and glasses of red wine. Mostly I relished in the small details; eating meals without interruption, sleeping without the buzz of the monitor, and walking around hands free. On Saturday afternoon we took a beautiful fall walk before dinner. I was covered in massage oils and feeling high on life. No baby, no stroller, no worries. I thought: is this what my life was like before baby? I don’t remember feeling so blissful.
Reuniting with my firstborn was, of course, wonderful. He saw me and it was all over. Daddy daycare and unlimited cookies are no match for the milk train. Even though I said I hoped the time apart would wean him, I secretly wanted him to nurse. I guess I’m not ready either. (I pumped while we were apart to ensure I didn’t lose my milk supply. Waylon won’t take it from a bottle or cup, so I donated it to a newly adopted baby which makes me feel very warm inside).
This weekend marks a milestone in parenthood, one that I’m grateful for. As a friend so bluntly put it, “at some point you have to cut the cord and get a margarita.” True story.
What about you? When did you first leave your baby overnight?
***
The first time I left my first overnight was when I was in the hospital giving birth to my second. She was 2 years & a few weeks old. And honestly that is what I was worried about most of all – not the c-section, not the new baby, just worrying how she’d make out. Of course she was fine. Didn’t even cry when she left me in the hospital to go home with my Mom (thank goodness…my hormones woudln’t have been able to handle that). On a somewhat related note – I’m thrilled that my little guy has taken 3 bottles so far. I remember you posting that “next time” you’ll do a weekly bottle. I’m hoping to keep up with it since, like your Waylon, my first never took pumped milk from a bottle or a cup. It was nice to go away for 3 1/2 hrs! Instead of having the 2 hr. curfew! Here’s hoping I can find the discipline to pump at least once a week! :) Maybe since I told you “in public” I’ll have to hold myself accountable?
Yes! I’m going to have to vow to do this too! I’m proud of you.
I’ve left Olivia for a total of four nights, one when she was 3 months, one when she was 12 months and two when she was 15 months. Always hard. I always cry. My sis-in-law in pregnant and she thinks I’m crazy for being so attached. Just wait, she will be too.
I know, I’ve had people tell me I’m crazy for waiting this long. I’ve also had others tell me they’d wait longer.
Before Waylon, I thought my sister-in-law Zoe was totally nuts for not leaving her babies overnight. Foot in mouth.
Back in the beginning of August when he was almost 14 months. I was gone one day and at first I thought I’d have a hard time sleeping that night but I actually got to sleep past 7 for once in more than a year. It was heaven.
Now ask me again in about a month after hubby and I take our 6 day long 2nd honeymoon. I think I’ll be basket case by day 3.
Second honeymoon. That sounds amazing!
For my brother- in-laws wedding when Gracie was 13 months old. I was so worried I just kept drinking Southern Comfort, pretty soon after that I stopped being so worried. So I began to celebrate this parenthood milestone, with of course, Southern Comfort. Before I knew it I was bringing down the house with my ‘freed mommy’ dance moves. I ended the night with a 1AM Wawa quesadilla run. It was marvelous.
Haha, that sounds amazing. It’s something to celebrate!
Jada and Tage were both almost two when we left each of them over night. They weren’t nursing at that point. I don’t think I could do it if they were still nursing.
I know, I thought that he would scream to nurse. I think if I’m away he forgets?
But I totally get why you don’t leave them!
The first time that stuck out to me was when Adam was 15 months old and I got a call that my mom was in the hospital (she had stage 4 cancer). I took off like a rocket and ended up spending the next 10 days away from my baby while my mom was dying. That was rough-I knew he was in good hands with daddy and daycare, but having him there would have been such a comfort. Daddy and Adam came on the last night my mom was semi-with it and said their goodbyes. My baby got the last good night with my mom, which was such a blessing.
Now the first time that I left my baby for real was our first night together-actually he left me because he got taken to another hospital for their NICU. He was there for 14 days and I left him every night, except for 2. That was hard too and I don’t want to repeat it with number two who will be here in December (although I am feeling ready to have this baby now!).
I am hoping for a nice relaxing getaway when I leave number two for the first time!
Wow. It sounds like you’ve made it through some difficult times with a positive attitude. That’s amazing. Cheers to finding time for vacation away!
Declan and I left Eme for the first time at 15 months old…we went on a 4 day/5night trip to the Florida Keys and IT WAS AMAZING. We missed her hardcore the whole time but she didn’t miss us a lick. Figures ;) I wasn’t nursing anymore so that part didn’t matter. But it was SO!REFRESHING!OMG. The best ever. I dont think we’ll ever go away again, until we’re like, empty nesters. Because I think getting someone to watch my TWO children is a lot harder than one. But yea. It was a good time. Glad you had fun ;)
Yay for mommy time away! I left Isla June for the first time and proceeded to almost die in a bike accident. Ha! Then I didn’t leave her again for quite a few months later. She took bottle Bobbie milk thoug, so it was a sometimes option.
I love that you donated your milk. :)
7 weeks! It was a really tough day, Its just baby and I all week, we only get Daddy on the weekends. He was coming home on a Friday and I found out my friends bachelorette party was near by – it was a rough fussy day, I had plenty of milk pumped and I left for the night! It was the most like myself I had felt in 10 months, and the least guilty I had felt in 7 weeks. I felt like Daddy was overdue to figure things out on his own – and he was amazing. Thank heavens for breast pumps – sanity savers!
Amen!
We are quickly approaching 18 months and still no overnights. I am so not ready. I still get sad when he decides to sleep in the crib over our bed at night (he still wakes once in the night). But I think it is great that you did it and enjoyed it, way to go momma! I can only hope I get there before another child enters the picture, because I feel it will be all over at that point.
2 kids. When does one sleep?
How did you donate your milk? That’s a really cool idea!
One of the women who was along has a friend with a newly adopted infant who needs milk! It was her idea. Brilliant.
awesome! good job to both you and waylon! i still haven’t left sammy overnight…
and how/who re: milk donations?
this is bec!
Hello Bec! See above for answer.
I think it’s totally okay that you haven’t left Sammy yet. Not that you were asking…but I get it!
It never really gets easier to leave your kids but it’s a double edged sword because you can’t be with them all the time either. Well you can but I for one would be a lunatic if I never got away. Boys are 5 and 3.5 and we left for 5 nights last March for NYC. We vowed next time it would be 4 nights or less. Actually I think our exact words were next time they are coming with us. But we will leave them with grandma again. It’s healthy for all of us to be apart sometimes. And it let’s them know that they can actually survive life without mama.
Good for you for having a pampering 36 hours!