My sister and I went to New York City for the day on Tuesday. It all started a few weeks ago when tickets to the daytime talk show The View randomly came in the mail. I’d signed up for them two years ago and assumed I’d been rejected, but apparently a two year waiting list is normal for tickets to live shows. Now you know.
I was excited, Kelly was excited. Partly it was the show and being part of live tv, but it was also a great excuse to visit one of the greatest cities on earth.
But first we had to drop off Waylon…which also happened to be the scene of the epic tweet between me and my BFF Whoopi.
It was the night before and we were headed to my parent’s house outside of Philadelphia, rocking out to old CDs and trying to keep a one year old happy in the car. Halfway there I wrote a little tweet to Ms. Goldberg about being excited to finally see the ladies of The View tomorrow and trying suppress my “It’s Whoopi Goldberg” screams. A few seconds later she direct messaged me back and I just about peed my pants.
Obviously we freaked out, which is why we stayed up too late making signs that said I HEART WHOOPI with pictures of her face plastered on it.
In retrospect, it’s a little embarrassing.
Later, after less than 4 hours of sleep, we left the house in the wee hours of the morning to arrive in time to get great seats and guarantee our entrance to the show. Fact: Even if you have tickets that you signed up for two years ago, admission is not guaranteed. You also don’t get to pick which show you attend. Now you know.
The line was long but we made it into the first group (#20 and 21) and were granted entrance fairly quickly. We were excited, but sad for those who arrived, with tickets, a little too late. I thought about how they probably got up early too; did their hair, picked out an outfit, told all their relatives to look for them on TV, drove hours (or even flew!) to be there and then didn’t get in because of traffic or poor planning. Sorry guys. Now you know.
Once we entered the building, we were signed in, checked for bombs, and then let into a holding area to stand for an hour and a half. It was hot and smelly and not glamorous. We were allowed to pee but not sit down. An old lady tried to sit on a broken down radiator but was shooed off almost immediately. We waited quietly for her to pass out.
Finally a few low level employees came to quiet our growing mob mentality with promises of seats and juice and celebrities. They probably said TURN OFF YOUR CELL PHONES 100 times. I listened but others didn’t. We judged them.
Eventually we were shown to our seats at 10:30am (the show tapes at 11), nearly 3 hours after we arrived. The set was different than I imagined. When you’re watching on TV, the room looks glitzy and large. In reality the set is small and shabby. We were underwhelmed but still excited. They sat us literally feet from the stage. I tried not to feel bad for the suckers behind us (pictured below).
As it turns out, the joke was on us. Because we were sitting so close to the ladies, we were not on camera. Still, nothing could curb our enthusiasm. We were going to see Whoopi, Sherri, Joy, and Elizabeth in person and that was exciting enough.
When the ladies finally came out, we were pretty pumped. I wanted to whip out my sign but we were only allowed to on the commercial breaks (she never did see them). I also wanted to stand up and jump around, but we were not allowed to do that either because we were right in front of a cameraman.
Surprisingly we were allowed to take pictures during a few designated times, though I didn’t end up taking many because as one of the tech crew servants screamed during a set change, “This is the most stressful show we’ve ever done!” Meaning there were a lot of set changes and it was chaotic during the commercial breaks. A few times we were even ushered out of our seats to sit elsewhere while they set up special staging for the singers. It was during this shuffle that my dress caught on a piece of camera equipment and a unsuspecting cameraman saw my flesh colored spanx. Sorry dude.
Anyways, I was distracted.
One of my favorite moments during the show was when the set photographer put her things under my sister’s chair and Kelly leaned over and whispered, “Look! I’m part of it!” I don’t know why, but this struck me as very funny.
I also really enjoyed seeing the women up close. Most of them were shorter than I imagined and less good looking. I was most surprised by Elizabeth who always looks perfect on screen. Up close she looked more like a regular human being and was much more likable. I actually kind of loved her. Sherri was pretty great too, she came into the crowd and smiled and waved to us. Actually everyone except Joy (predictably stand offish) was very friendly and engaged. I tried not to look like a goober when they smiled at me, but I couldn’t help it. I was star struck.
All in all, it was a pretty weird show. Instead of its usual format it was The View: Gospel Brunch Edition, so there was a lot of music and then a random cooking session in which we were instructed to make a lot of “oooh” and “ahh” sounds.
I would like to go back for a normal show. I would also like to see Babs.
After the taping was over, my sister and I met my blogging friend Molly for lunch.
I’d never met Molly before, so there was all that what if it’s awkward and what if I accidentally talk about hemorrhoids anxiety.
We met at Cafe Lalo, the restaurant where Shopgirl and NY152 were supposed to meet in You’ve Got Mail, quite appropriate for our particular situation (Molly’s choice). We arrived late, lost, and sweating. Luckily Molly was everything I imagined and more; sweet, likable, and a great conversationalist. We could have talked for hours.
Consequently, I did end up talking about anal fissures, but it was fine, and after promises to see each other again soon (and a little metro help), we parted ways and my sister and I did a little exploring downtown before heading home.
Mostly I just wanted to be in the same place Tina Fey/Liz Lemon is on a daily basis. My sister took an awkward picture of me there. You can view it below.
After that we just walked around and breathed in the city air.
I wanted to stay forever but my rock hard boobs reminded me that I needed to head home soon.
It was a great day. I love New York. It’s a city of real people with real dreams and a whole lot of tourists trying to blend in.
Speaking of… I will leave you with a picture of me trying to look New York glamorous and failing so badly that it was too funny not to share.
I <3 NY