For My Nephew

Dear Bennet,

The day your sister was born, I was new to the family, meeting Grandma and Grandpa for the first time, wondering why on earth I was standing in this hospital room with people I didn’t know. I almost passed out thinking about your mom giving birth, the whole thing seemed totally gross. But when I held Jada in my arms, I felt my heart shift and make room for her. I loved her the second I laid eyes on her. I loved her big eyes and sweet skin and perfect baby smell. I knew I would love her forever.

The day your brother was born, your uncle Austin and I were newlyweds. We rushed to see him the moment we got the call. When I held Tage in my arms, I felt my heart shift again, making room. I unwrapped his carefully swaddled blanket to inspect his every limb and my eyes filled with tears. I pretended it was allergies. When I looked at his face, I thought I’d never seen anything so beautiful. I knew I would love him forever.

The day you were born, I was a new mother. I was holding my baby when your mom called. I couldn’t believe how quickly you came, how easy you made it for your mom to bring you into this world. I squealed and rushed around the house like I was getting ready for something. I couldn’t believe our good fortune, another beautiful, healthy, baby boy. I wanted to come see you right away, but I had to wait, which is hard for me because I’m very impatient. I wanted to hold you, kiss you, tell you how special you are.

When I finally laid eyes on you the next day, my heart shifted again, making room. Except this time I was looking with a mother’s eyes. I knew what your mom knew. I knew the indescribable pain of having a child. Not the physical pain, but the shooting pain in the center of your heart loving someone so much.

Welcome to the world, baby boy.

I will love you forever,

Aunt Kate

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